Fifty Shades of Grey – The Ultimate Wine Lovers Guide

It’s raunchy, sultry and oh yes, just a touch erotic. Last night the Fifty Shades of Grey movie premiered in Australia. The adult romance novels were released a couple of years back and they were the talk of the town, murmurs of ‘soft porn’, ‘erotic, kinky fun’ normally popped up in convos about the books. It was one of those books you didn’t particularly want to be seen reading on public transport. Much better suited to a bubble bath or on the couch with a big glass of wine.

There’s no doubt wine can be spoken/written about in an erotic and tantalising way, from the way the Cab softly caresses your mouth to the seductively long finish of your Shiraz leaving you desperately craving more and the way the Champagne cork ‘pops’ out of the bottle shaft and its nectar overflows out of the bottle.

Wine and sex, are definitely a perfect pairing. Forget the wine and food matching, let’s get a bit risqué on this blog. Valentine’s Day is only mere days away *wink, wink*.

Fifty Shades of Grey novelist EL James, already knows about this dirty little secret of wine and sex matching because believe it or not. Within the saucy empire of Mr. Grey a line of real wines have been created! Yep, that’s right wine lovers, ‘2011 Fifty Shades of Grey Red Satin Syrah’ and a ‘2012 Fifty Shades of Grey White Silk Gewürztraminer and Sauvignon Blanc blend’ have been created.
It’s almost tempting to order a couple of bottles from America, grab the movie on Apple TV and well… I’ll leave that up to your imagination! It’s just a touch disheartening in my opinion that the tasting notes for these wines aren’t on the sexy side. Trust me, I could write better!

While researching this post, I literally typed into Google “wine increases” and the first and second suggested were to do with ‘wine increases libido’. Looks like I’m not the only one out there searching this! So what did I find that supports the ultimate sexy wine pairing? Well…

Research into wine and sex..

So Google lead me to read about a study done in 2009 by Italian doctors who concluded that red wine does in fact increase women’s sexual desires. After reading through the report in the Telegraph, I understand why the TC community weren’t asked to take part –  “women who drank more than two glasses a day were excluded from the study to avoid the possible confounding effects of drunkenness”. Moderation (and consistency apparently) is the key after all folks!

Interestingly enough, one of the reasons stated in the article for the possible reason why wine increases libido is that the antioxidants in red wine increases blood flow to key areas of the body getting you hot and horny.

Wine aromas can turn you on…

Another piece of research I came across was on Wine Folly about how wine aromas can get the juices flowing. Apparently there have been various studies conducted but like a lot of this type of research there is nothing conclusive. The below is definitely not a bible – so don’t blame me if he/she doesn’t pounce on you after smelling that glass of Champagne or Pinot.

• For a turned on man, try these types of aromas: lavender, caramel, butter, orange, licorice, baking spice and vanilla. And again Wine Folly suggests the following wines; fine Champagne, Moscato, Dry Sherry, Tawny Port, Vin Santo, Grenache, Syrah and Rosé wines.
• For a turned on women, try these types of aromas: musky, earthy, woody, licorice and cherry. Wine Folly suggests going for one of these types of wines; fine Nebbiolo, Barbera, Sangiovese, Zinfandel and even rustic Pinot Noir.

And what does Mr Grey have to say about wine & sex?

I actually didn’t realise how many wine references are through the books, I only looked through the 1st of the 3 books and this is probably not even a 10th of the mentions. Oh yes, Fifty Shades of Grey and wine = match made in silk sheet heaven!

“Pouilly Fumé okay with you?” “I know nothing about wine, Christian.  I’m sure it will be fine.” My voice is soft and hesitant.  My heart is thumping.  I want to run.  This is seriously rich.  Seriously over-the top Bill Gates style wealthy.  What am I doing here?  You know very well what you’re doing here – my subconscious sneers at me.  Yes, I want to be in Christian Grey’s bed. “Here.” He hands me a glass of wine.  Even the glasses are rich… heavy, contemporary, crystal.  I take a sip, and the wine is light, crisp, and delicious.

“In very simple terms, I want you to want to please me,” he says softly.  His voice is hypnotic. “How do I do that?” My mouth is dry, and I wish I had more wine.  Okay, I understand the pleasing bit, but I am puzzled by the soft-boudoir-Elizabethan-torture set up.  Do I want to know the answer?

“Are you thirsty, Anastasia?” he asks, his voice teasing “Yes,” I breathe, because my mouth is suddenly parched.  I hear the ice clink against the glass, and he puts it down again and leans down and kisses me, pouring a delicious crisp, liquid into my mouth as he does.  It’s white wine.  It’s so unexpected, hot, though it’s chilled, and Christian’s lips are cool. “More?” he whispers. I nod.  It tastes all the more divine because it’s been in his mouth.  He leans down, and I drink another mouthful from his lips… oh my.

“Now you have to keep still,” he whispers.  “If you move, Anastasia, you’ll get wine all over the bed.” My hips flex automatically. “Oh no.  If you spill the wine, I will punish you, Miss Steele.” I groan and desperately fight the urge to tilt my hips, pulling on my restraint.  Oh no… please.

“Still with me?” he whispers, his voice rich, warm and seductive.  He takes a sip of his wine, his penetrating stare holding mine.

“I thought of you when I tasted it.  How did you get to be so knowledgeable about wine?” “I’m not knowledgeable, Anastasia, I just know what I like.”

I flush some more. “You’re very graceful.” “Why thank you, Miss Steele,” he murmurs.  He sits down beside me, holding a bottle of wine. “Chablis?”

It’s definitely very much clear that Mr. Grey likes his French whites with mentions of Pouilly Fumé (Sauvignon Blanc), Chablis (Chardonnay) and Champagne. A man with good taste! Ok so yes he is a bit looney with all his S&M who-ha but everyone to their own.

And when Anastasia gets together with her room-mate for drinks it’s always cheap red wine and on occasions it’s out of teacups. I like their style!

If you’re looking for some more tantalising reading and listening, check out The 50 Shades of Grey Sex Mixtape You + Your Lover Need to Listen to. Trust me, you’ll be in the mood after reading it and downing a few glasses of vino.